Diagnosis

It was just like any other day. It was past my dinner. I still had some time to go to bed. I was scrolling through my phone. I suddenly stumbled upon a post from my college friend, Radha. It made me to drop my phone because I was shocked to see it. The post read, "cancer may have started the battle but I will win the war".

My heart started beating faster. My mouth had gone dry. I was staring at my phone screen as if I had seen a ghost. I could not believe what I was looking at. My friend Radha had posted this and it made me wonder if she had been diagnosed with cancer. I could not understand what I should do. I could not decide whether to message her and ask her if she is well. Also a lot of people do not like to discuss their illnesses and this conversation could become awkward. But then I decided message her first and then speak with her.

I sent her a direct message, "I saw your post. Are you okay?" I thought it would be better to keep it vague so that she would not feel bad about asking. Also she would not feel as if I am sympathizing with her situation because people often do not like being at the receiving end of sympathy.

I waited for her response. A lot of thoughts had been crowding my mind. She had been my classmate so she was the same age as me, 27 years. She had been married just a year before. She had whole life ahead of her and now she has cancer. I felt really sorry for her because probably her life will get cut short because of this diagnosis. It is really unfortunate that at the beginning of the youth itself she had been consumed with such a terminal condition. I kept remembering her face and how she you to smile during the college. I remember I went to her wedding and I was the only attendee from our college. I remember how she hugged me and thanked me for attending her wedding which happened just the previous year. It was unbelievable how everything has changed in a single year.

I still had not received a response from Radha. I eagerly waited for her response. I knew that the response from her was going to make me sadder but still I wanted to hear something from her. Several hours later I received her text, "everything is okay right now. But there is a long way to go". Her enigmatic text did not relieve me. It created more questions in my mind. What if she in remission? Is she receiving treatment? Is she okay? Does she need any help? I had more questions and I knew I was not going to get answer.

Then I received another text from her, "you are the only one who reached out. None of our friends had asked me. Just like my wedding day even today you are the only one who is caring for me. Maybe you would be the only one with me on my life journey. Thank you so much for being with me".

That one made me cry. It felt like she knew the severity of her condition. It felt like she was using this opportunity to let me know that I had a special place in her life. It was less like a text and more like the last words of someone. With tears in my eyes I replied, "take care and get well soon", because that was all I could have said.