How to use Brain

Sometimes I feel like having a Brain is overrated. I mean sure it keeps our body functioning and it's the reason we're not soulless people, but it doesn't always work.

At least not for me. Now I'm not saying I'm not smart, I think I can get by, it's just that sometimes I feel like that meme of a person with a buffer sign above their head trying to figure out where my Brain went.

In school, I was fine. I did well academically and i understood the concepts pretty well. But that was about it, since school does not teach us anything apart from mugging up the syllabus. I was not confident in public speaking, I didn't know how to hold a proper conversation, I couldn't ask all the questions I had, and I really did not understand the importance of knowing about current affairs.

I'm learning to unlearn all that school taught or didn't teach me. I did grow up and gain friends and human connections, but whatever I learn from ages 3 to 17 feels useless when I look at the outside world now.

I'm in a career where I have to be inquisitive. I have to observe and talk and interact to create. I struggled with this throughout my first two years of college. I'm not a very outgoing person, so to put myself out there was a challenge that made me anxious everytime.

I blamed school for it, if only to escape my own incompetencies and accept that i needed to change. Over time, i turned that blame to myself. Or rather my brain.

Sometimes I feel like something is off about it. I might understand something from reading about it, but I cannot remember what i've read. I used to avoid reading the news for this reason. I saw the headlines and read the articles but the next day I forget all about it and what caused it. I am aware now of the multiple wars and protests around the world, but I still cannot tell you for the life of me what it's causes or history are.

That doesn't mean I shouldn't stay informed. Remembering is a habit that I'm still budding.

Its not only the news though. I barely watch TV shows and movies. I just don't really care enough to. There are some shows everyone must have watched at any point in time, I haven't.

Sometimes I feel so slow in my thoughts. I can't prioritise the things that matter, and then I end up blaming my Brain for it.

But maybe it's a me problem. I wish there was a tutorial on how to use brain perfectly and efficiently.