Just a friend

In 2009 I joined a new company wherein a pilot project was about to start. It was my proper first corporate job because before that I used to work at a lab. It was my first exposure to the corporate environment.

I was going to work with 40 other people who shared the academic background with me. All of them were very much similar to my age. Our family backgrounds too were similar. Needleless to say that all of us had formed a very close bond with each other and had become great friends. At that time all of us were around 23 or 24 years old. Just out of college and enjoying our lives.

Few years had gone by and the life progressed. Most of my friends had already been married or at least engaged. We had been attending the weddings and parties of our friends. During these events there was one thing that was common. I was single and so was my another friend P.

P and I had been good friends right from the start. A lot of my friends would tell me that he was perfect for me. But I often would brush that thought away thinking that I am too outspoken for him. He was a simple and shy guy. Maybe I was too frank for him. I would often feel that our characteristics did not match by our behavioural traits. Behaviourwise both of us were polar opposite.

Then it came the year 2018. Excluding both of us our entire friend group was married. One time our group was going to meet for a quick meal. For this meal I had gone early and apparently P too head come early. Before our friends could join it was just the two of us for approximately 1 hour at the restaurant. We spoke about our life, career, and everything. Both of us expressed the concerns from our families that at the age of 30 we had been single. Maybe that was the spark that both of us needed to initiate the talks. Maybe I felt that instead of finding a partner among the strangers, I should seek companionship from a friend.

After our meal, the next day I had received a text from him. It was about the beauty of relationships. I found it very emotional so I replied to him. That is how the communication between us started to become regular. Everyday he would send me some or the other text about relationships which I was finding relatable to my situation. After a couple of weeks we decided to attend an art festival together.

After attending the art festival while we were talking, I expressed my feelings towards him. I told him that maybe we should think about our friendship to take it to the next level. He smiled and then said that he too was thinking on the same lines but had never thought I would express my feelings towards him. He asked me for some time to think over this. I agreed and told him that I would not push him to make the decision faster.

A few days later he told me that he felt that I was not the right person for him. He told me that he thought we were polar opposite and I did agree to that. Both of us continued to remain friends even though everything that had happened between us. We still were friends and had been speaking with each other about life and career. Sometimes he would still exchange a lovey dovey text with me and I would tell him that probably that chapter had already been closed by him. However how it is shown in the movie it did not happen to me that way. Knowing that we could not be together did not break me or made me cry. Sure for a couple a couple of days I was sad but I still carried on with my life.

Last year I received a text message from him. He had sent me the invitation for his wedding. That provided me the much needed closure. I could not attend his wedding but at least I had accepted the reality. I was happy for him that finally he met the person with whom he could feel safe and loved.

He stays in a different country hence I was not able to meet him for last 5 years. However I know that whenever I will meet him the next time there would not be any weird or awkward tension between us. We had always been friends and we will remain friends.