Respect

Respect. One word but each generation sees and interpret it differently. It is interesting to see how the idea of respect has changed over the years.

Once my grandmother was telling me a story from her childhood days. She told me that it was considered disrespectful to call anybody using their names. Even to her siblings she used to call Tai, Akka, Appa, or Anna. As per her generation it was only respectful to call everyone using an appropriate salutation. To show respect to the elders they had considered to sit below the elders. If an elder is sitting on the chair then it would not be considered appropriate to sit on the chair for the younger once. The younger once would sit at a level that is below the elders - that is on the ground. As per my grandmother in her generation everything revolved around the respect for elders, peers, and youngers. In her generation respect was given without expecting it back. This made me think how her generation treated each and every person. Even a single act would have been considered disrespectful though no disrespect was intended. After hearing her story I felt that in her life she must have walked on egg shells. I assumed her life must have been difficult.

Once me and my dad had been discussing politics. Somewhere our discussion turned to the topic of respect. He told me that in his generation the definition of respect had widened, at the same time the strictness towards it had reduced. Unlike my grandmother generation, his generation called the siblings by their names or nicknames. It was not mandatory for them to call their siblings with salutations such as Tai or Anna. It was completely voluntary to use these. But it was absolutely mandatory to respect the elders. It was mandatory to respect anybody from the reputed profession. If someone is an elder or from a reputed profession they should never be called by their names. This discussion taught to me a lot. I felt that in my dad's generation the definition of respect had been less strict, tolerable, and acceptable.

Then comes my generation. We millennials have different requirements for respect. In fact we do not expect anybody to call us with our salutation. We prefer everybody to refer to us with our first name irrespective of their age, relation, or status. For us respect meant treating everybody fairly. We believe that if someone is good to us we will be good to them. I believe our generation considered that respect is mutual. 'Give respect and get respect' is our motto. For us respect is just being polite. We do not expect much.

But nowadays that definition of respect has changed a lot. Recently I saw a comment on social media which stated, "why should I respect you? You have done nothing to deserve respect from me". This comment made me quiver. Maybe it is something that my generation could not have accepted and hence it did not sit well with me. I felt that why does anybody need to earn respect. Nobody is expecting the other person to get up and salute. It is all about being polite. But speaking to others politely is not something we get easily these days. This is one of the reasons why I do not like commenting on social media because I know those who do not agree with me with put remarks disrespectfully.

While I completely understand that it is an individuals choice to decide to respect anyone. I feel social media had become a place where disrespect is by default.