The closet

In the last week I was working on my academic review projects. In my inbox I had received a project. It was simple with great compensation. The project required me to take photos of six outfits by themselves and wearing them. This was supposed to be for AI training. I decided to participate in that project.

After accepting the project I went through the guidelines. As per the guidelines I was required to wear three types of outfits. Two outfits should be too tight; two outfits should be too loose; and two outfits should perfectly fit me. To me this sounded like an interesting task. Also I felt that this is a task where I would be able to wear my outfits that I generally do not wear outside.

To complete the project what I needed to search my entire closet for the clothes that fit into the criteria for the project. I went through my entire closet. The outfits that were two tight were the easiest one to find. I had kept several outfits in one corner which I was going to wear after I lose certain inches. The outfits from my healthier, prettier, fitter tomorrow were really easy for me to find. I quickly took out those outfits and collected the photos with them. When I saw the photos of those outfits I immediately felt ashamed for not losing the weight for 2 years. I also felt highly motivated to lose my weight so that I can wear those outfits and look pretty.

Then it was the time to find the outfits that were to loose for me. I found this task to be easy. Recently I had ordered two oversized shirts that would have been perfect for this task. The oversized shirts were supposed to look cool but they looked like I had stolen them from my dad's closet. They really look atrocious on me. I purchased them but had not worn them even once outside. When I took the pictures with those shirts I again felt embarrassed to spend my hard earned money on trendy outfits that do not look good on me.

Then came the most difficult task. Two outfits which were supposed to fit me perfectly were the most difficult ones to find. I had taken out of you outfits which I had assumed fit me perfectly but they either turned out to be tight or loose at certain areas. Though I was always under the impression that they look good on me, I was surprised to see that they did not look good on me. The outfit which was my favourite either was tight or loose in the problem areas. Some outfit was giving the bulge that did not even exist on my body. I tried a lot of outfits but I was not getting the result that I needed to be submitted for the research. Finally I gave up and used an outfit that was fitting okay but not perfectly.

I submitted that study. And then I looked at all the outfits around me. Just by looking at all those outfits in the room made my head spin. Not only that I had to fold all these outfits and keep them back in the closet; but also I had realised that most of the clothes in my closet do not fit me. I looked at all those beautiful clothes thinking weather there is a problem with the clothes or with my body.

But then I rememberd that I am a woman in my late 30s and I have decided to embrace my imperfections. So I concluded that my body is fine but the problem is with the clothes. Surprising how I needed a research study to tell me that most of my outfits look atrocious.