When happiness comes with a little sadness

“Kuch toh hawa bhi sard thi, kuch tha tera khayal bhi,
Dil ko khushi ke saath saath hota raha malaal bhi.”
— Parveen Shakir
There's something about these lines that I really like. Not because they're extremely complicated but because they describe something we don't usually know how to explain.
Sometimes you are actually happy, but somewhere in the happiness, there is a little sadness too.
Nothing dramatic, nothing that you can clearly point towards.
Bas ek ajeeb sa feeling hota hai that something is missing, even when everything seems fine.
Maybe you've had this too. You are sitting with your friends, laughing at something completely stupid, having a genuinely good time, and then for a few seconds your mind goes somewhere else completely zoned out. You remember something, someone, an old place, an old version of yourself...... And suddenly that happiness feels slightly different.
The strange part is that the happy moment doesn't dissapear. You are still happy. You are still laughing. But there's this tiny bit of "MALAAL" sitting somewhere in the background.
And I think that's what make these lines so beautiful.
We usually think emotions have to be one thing at a time. If you are happy you shouldn't be sad. If you are over something you shouldn't miss it. If you're enjoying the present you shouldn't think about the past.
But maybe that's not how people actually work.
Sometimes we can miss something and still be greatful for where we are.
We can remember someone without wanting them back. We can look at an old pictures and smile because of the memory, while also feeling a little strange because that moment will never happen exactly in the same way again.
Maybe growing up is partly learning that two opposite feelings can exist together.
I've always found it interesting how one small line of poetry can make you think about so many things.
Kuch tha tera khayaal bhi-
Maybe that's the whole point. Sometimes there isn't a huge reason behind a mood. It's just a thought,a memory, a song, a weather change...
And suddenly your heart feels a little different.
Have you ever had a moment where you were genuinely happy but still felt a little sad at the same time?
And if you had to describe that feeling in one word, what would you call it?
For me, maybe it's simply malaal🤍
Maybe that's completely okay.