A slice of Joy

Well a strange thing happened to me today . I was out on my daily walk, though it hasn’t been much of a 'daily' walk lately.Winter arrived with its cold, bringing along laziness and a craving for coziness.But today was different the cold took a leave and the sun was out .I was out walking listening to my usual track , I don't know if it was the sun shining in my face or the light breeze acting as a silent companion, I found myself dancing ,don't know where I got the courage to do that my sister can write essays on how a terrible dancer I am but still there I was twirling around , hopping back and forth to the rhythm.The smell of flowers filled the air and I was suddenly drawn to it, it was like the flowers became aware I was watching them and were putting on a show , and I as if I'm their lover admired them deeply . Then I saw a child, he was on a walk with his mother , his face was filled with innocence and his sweet eyes threw out a curious look at me , his mother noticed It and she had a look of worry written softly across her face, but as soon as I smiled at her kid , her face was lit up in a smile only seen in the face of a mother when someone else was admiring her kid. It reminded me of my own mom and how she may have worn the same smile when someone was admiring me, that thought gave me a sense of comfort like her hand touching my face or when she affectionately calls me 'Minuchu' a name only used so freely by the people who loves me profoundly. There was no denying it, What I was feeling was joy . But how?
I have not felt like this in years or rather  I hadn't allowed myself to . For a long time the pattern has been the same ; even if happiness was served to me in a silver platter by the angels or even god himself offered to spoon feed it me I would refuse in fear of a stomach ache . But here I was dancing , I was that little girl again, she may not have known about so many things I know now , but if there was one thing she  understood perfectly it was how to enjoy the moment. I might return to my mundane life or the usual blues that colour it. But in this moment the world was yellow and it was real as real as the sun that was shining brightly on my face and I let myself step into that completely , I can face a stomach ache later, it's okay .