Relatives

Oh my God. Don't get me started on this topic. I can go on and on about it. Everything that I have seen and experienced in 30s about my own blood relative shocks me even today. Everything that I had believed in my childhood and adolescent years about my relatives had been completely shattered then I saw there real faces.

First let me speak about my relatives from dad's side. Right from my childhood I had been told by my mother and maternal aunts how horrible the relatives on my dad side have been. They would often tell me the stories of how miserably my paternal aunts and uncles had behaved. They would often me that how horrible the relatives from my dad side have been. My mother and my maternal aunts would always compare my relatives from dad's side with themselves saying that all the relatives from my mother's side had been extremely kind and nicest people to ever exist on this planet earth. Innocent me automatically would believe what my mother and my maternal aunts would tell me. I want always see my paternal relatives with suspicion. I would always be careful around my relatives from dad's side. I would not this agree that the relatives from my dad's side had been selfish at the same time I realised that what I had been told was only the half truth.

As I grew up whenever I would go to any family gathering at my dad's side I would walk on egg shells. I would answer every question with caution. Because that is what I had been told right from my childhood 'be wary of the relatives from your dad's side'. Though they would appear friendly and progressive. I would still keep a safe distance from them. I would give them brief answers without sharing any details about my life. My relations had been slightly distant with them because of my cautious behaviour that was driven by warnings I had received.

But then I saw the reality with my own eyes. The relatives on my maternal side were not at nice as they portrayed to be. They were equally or more selfish than my relatives from dad's side. My maternal relatives were only appearing nice to get the information from us. They had not been kind in reality but using the superficial kindness to use us as pawns. I was able to see the cracks in their narratives. I was able to see their real faces hidden behind the fake masks. In the end everything made a complete sense to me.

Relatives from either side are selfish. They would be with us because it is in their benefit to stay on our side. The family love does not exist in reality. Relatives stay close to us only if they get benefited from us. As soon as we are no longer profitable to them they will ensure to create a wall between us and them. That is the reality of relations.

When I saw and experienced this, it became my mantra, "trust no one, suspect everyone".

(Note: I have described my own experience. I expect readers to judge the people themselves)